HATE MAIL



Did your reality check bounce? Did your spiritual path lead to the funny farm? You'll probably try to persuade us to take this site down so you can continue leading your life in a fantasy world.

Well, go ahead. Send us some hate-mail. We can always use a good laugh. All irrational diatribes become the sole property of the Acorn Coffee Clubtm. Sending us anything implies permission to post it on our web site and poke fun at it for our amusement. Please keep them brief and try to incorporate new asinine ideas into the body of your rant.

Here's some of the hate mail, we've received already. Our comments are in red. We also added graphics to help you visualize our critics.



You people can't spel!

Ewe can't bee Sirius! We ran everything threw the spell checker, ina?

To whom it may concern:

My name is (Name and Institution removed). I possess several advanced degrees in Anthropology and Multi-cultural studies and I feel I need to relay to you that I have thoroughly vetted the subject and concluded that indigenous communities - I'm speaking of the social and cultural constructions of indigenous communities here- forbid the use of irony, satire and especially sarcasms. You have radically re-contextualized the accepted paradigm. What credentials do you possess that would allow you to do this? I must infrom you that your frequent use of sarcasm renders you inauthentic as indigenous persons.



Wow! It's such an honour to be corrected by someone with such impressive credentials as yours. Nange!



You people are so unprofessional!

I requested an Indian name from you over 24 hours ago. I was very clear in explaining that I needed it for a party I have to go to tonight. All my friends have Indian names and I certainly can't show up there tonight being the only one there without one can I? You are so inconsiderate! I can't believe you didn't respond to me. You people are just rude!



Sorry about that. Your Indian name is ookwe. Enjoy.



Dear Negative Persons,

When I saw your website, I got so upset I had to smudge my computer for a whole day!. Don't you people know that your prophesies tell you not to judge others and to share everything you have with everything who asks you? All this negativity is so destructive! Why can't you just share?

The star people have told us that we must never be negative. When you're negative you create a negative force with a negative frequency within your essence. You're creating a blockage in your spiritual system.



Why did you smudge your computer? We're so ignorant about our own ways we need someone like you to explain them to us. Please let us know how that worked out for you! Did you chant or anything? Please send us a transcript. We love to post stuff like that on our web site so others can see the extent of your wisdom. Also can you recommend any products to get rid of that blockage in our spiritual system. Do they make spitchul Metamucil?









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