SEASON EIGHT
EPISODE 5: SAKURAN ENCOUNTER
By: Elektra
SEASON EIGHT
EPISODE 5: SAKURAN ENCOUNTER
By: Elektra
SPACE: THE FINAL FRONTIER. THESE ARE THE VOYAGES OF THE WWF TITANPRIZE. IT'S MISSION: TO EXPLORE AND ENTERTAIN NEW SOCIETIES AND NEW CIVILIZATIONS. TO BOLDLY GO WHERE NO WRESTLER HAS GONE BEFORE!
TITANPRIZE CREW:
Captain Vince McMahon
First Officer, Commander
Shane McMahon
Chief Engineer,
Commander Stephanie McMahon
Chief of Chiefs,
Commander Linda McMahon
Chief of Security,
Commander Kane
Chief Medical Officer,
Dr. Taker
Diagnostics Officer,
Lieutenant Commander Jericho
Tactical Officer,
Lieutenant Commander Austin
Transporter Chief,
Lieutenant Commander Debra McMichael
Communications Officer,
Lieutenant Rock
Counselor Al Snow
(assisted by H.E.A.D.)
... And many more!
WWF TITANPRIZE - CAPTAIN'S READY ROOM
"Captain's log, stardate 080520.00. We are in orbit around a planet called Sakura. It seems to be inhabited by a relatively intelligent species. We have beamed down previously and have seen a market square. Our plans are to barter with these people for supplies and food..." Captain McMahon leaned back in his chair, pleased, "Finally we have contact outside the Titanprize! The crew is quite excited about the contact, and rightfully so! End log."
Captain McMahon looked out his window at the planet and smiled. Finally, a change of scenery!
***
SICKBAY
"There. All fixed. Now get your little Houdinian ass off my diagnostics table!" Dr. Taker snapped at Ensign Crash. The petite Ensign was sporting some bruised ribs due to a game of football on the holodeck that got out of hand. Well... not really out of hand... but poor Crash had been tackled by Ensign Rikishi during the game. He had managed to disappear before too much damage was done.
Crash quickly limped out of Sickbay.
"Dr. Taker, you really should work on your bedside manner..." Ensign Angle said as he came up to the dark doctor, "Treating a patient like that lacks integrity..."
Taker spun around to glare at Ensign Angle, "And messing around with a married woman lacks integrity too, Ensign!" he snapped.
Angle opened his mouth in surprise, "Messing around? Are you speaking of Stephanie? Why, I'll have you know that her and I are just..."
"I don't WANT to know, Ensign. Nor do I care. What are you doing in here anyway?" Taker asked.
"Well... I figured we worked so well together during the Nytron occupation that..."
"That... what? You'd come back in here and annoy me again? Get your stank ass out of my sickbay, boy!"
"Dr. Taker, sir... you need a man of my intelligence and integrity to help you develop a more positive bedside manner. After all, we are lost billions of light years from home! Surely our crew deserves a doctor who cares..."
Dr. Taker scowled at Angle. On the other side of the Sickbay, Dr. Piro snickered quietly. One quick look from Dr. Taker shut him up.
The dark doctor rolled his eyes. He would get rid of Angle later. For now, he might as well scowl and bear it...
When Ensign Angle least expected it, Dr. Taker would kick the boy's stank ass all over the Titanprize.
***
PLANET SAKURA - MARKET SQUARE
"Ooooh... aren't this the coolest sunglasses you've ever seen, Edge!" Ensign Christian said as he showed his brother the goods on a nearby kiosk.
"That large bug-eyed style will go perfectly with your hair, brother! The blue of the frames will also bring out the colour in your cheeks!"
"Colour co-ordination RULES, brother!" Christian replied, and high-fived Edge. "Oh! Here are a pair for you!" he handed him a pair of wide, red-framed sunglasses.
"Excellent! Man, we will look so AWESOME with these shades! The chicks will go crazy!"
"Totally shade-a-licious, Edge!" Christian said. "Think we should get a pair for the commish?"
"Oh definitely, Christian!" Edge replied, "Hey, maybe we can teach him a bit about fashion too! I mean, plaid flannel is SO not in this season!"
"Fashion RULES!" Christian replied. The two brothers bought their sunglasses, and moved on to another kiosk - this one selling mirrors.
Stephanie watched the blonde brothers from a few feet away. She was standing with Ensign Lita and Lt. Commander Jericho looking over a kiosk full of engineering equipment, "What lamers..." she muttered as Edge and Christian headed off in what could only be described as a 'Cocky Kanatian' walk, "I can't believe Shane hangs around them so much..."
"Hey... to each their own," Lita replied. She picked a tool up off the kiosk in front of her, and turned to Jericho, "Think we could make use of this, Chris?"
Jericho took it and studied it, "It's a bit old-fashioned, but I'm sure we can,"
"Good!" Stephanie replied, and whipped a piece of plastic out of her pocket. She handed it to the humanoid at the Kiosk. Even here, a credit card was a credit card, "We'll take it!"
"Using daddy's money again, huh Stephie?" Jericho replied, hoping his smugness was convincing. He still hadn't told Stephanie her hand-made emotion chip didn't work.
"I'll have you know, bits-for-brains, that THIS is my OWN credit card. I DO make a living as a WrestleFleet officer you know!" she snapped.
"You make a living doing other things too from what I've heard..." Jericho muttered. Odd... that insult hadn't been in his memory banks. Perhaps his positronic net was adjusting for the situation? Yes, that must have been it. He surely couldn't have made it up by himself. That would require a personality... and a personality would require a functioning emotion chip.
"Why you stupid....!"
"GUYS, GUYS!" Lita jumped in, "Stop, ok? We need to get back to the Titanprize!"
Stephanie pouted, "HE started it!"
"Did not..." Jericho replied.
"Did too!" Stephanie snapped back. "YOU'RE the one who made that snide comment!"
"YOU'RE the one who called me bits-for-brains!" he answered. For some reason, pretending to show emotion was becoming easier and easier...
"Oh for heaven sake! Would you two just give up the arguing and finally admit---" Lita was suddenly interrupted as screams erupted from the market place.
The sound of phaser fire could be heard right behind them, and Lt. Commander Jericho pulled Stephanie out of an errant energy beam.
Everyone was running amuck as the market square was taken over by twenty armed men, firing weapons as if they were going out of style.
"Lita?" Stephanie called out. "Where's LITA!" She asked as she huddled behind a kiosk with Jericho.
Jericho looked over the top of the kiosk and scanned the area for Lita's communicator. Ahh... there it was ... about three feet in front of him. But there was no sign of Lita, "I can't see her..." he replied, finding himself somewhat concerned. But... how could he feel concern?
"You are in the custody of the Kayfabe army!" A voice said beside him and Stephanie. He turned to see two of the armed men training their weapons on them, "Stand up, hands in the air! Make a move, and we'll shoot!"
Commander Stephanie and Lt. Commander Jericho did as they were told. The Kayfabes motioned for three more people, who came up behind the two Titanprize Engineers. The man who had been speaking proceeded to rip the comm badges off their uniforms, and the men behind them poked their guns in the WrestleFleet officer's backs, "Move..." the leader said.
Stephanie and Jericho didn't hesitate to obey.
***
TITANPRIZE - SICKBAY (later)
"Well, Mr. Taker, sir... here's your first chance to show a proper bedside manner!" Ensign Angle said as Dr. Taker tended to an unconscious Edge and Christian. The two blondes were the only ones the Titanprize crew could find after the commotion on the planet. It seemed that whoever had attacked the market square didn't care for two conceited pretty boys.
Dr. Taker turned to Angle, "Let's say this.... here is your first chance to get your stank ass out of my sickbay before I stick my boot up it!"
Ensign Angle frowned, "Hmm... well... it seems you still need some work..." he replied, then studied the unconscious Kanatians, "What do you think happened down there?" he asked.
"Damned if I know, boy..." Taker replied. "I ain't a mind reader! Now why don't you leave me alone and go teach Vampy that it’s wrong to experiment on human beings!"
"Talk to Dr. Piro?!" Angle gasped, "He's a NYTRON! I would never associate with one of them!"
Dr. Taker turned back to his patients. Maybe if he ignored Angle, the Olympic Ensign would leave him alone...
***
PLANET SAKURA - UNKNOWN LOCATION
Lita woke up slowly, feeling a wet cloth against her head. She found herself lying on something soft. A bed? She groaned as she sat up, "What? Where am I?" she asked.
"OH! You're awake!" a voice said happily. A male Sakuran entered the room carrying a tray of food, "My sweet little Lisa! It's been so long!"
Lita furrowed her brow, "Lisa?"
"Hush now, dear. You got roughed up by the Kayfabe rebels quite a bit. Here, have some soup! It's your favourite!" the man said, and pulled out a bed table. He removed the cover from one of the dishes.
Lita looked at the tray. Well... the soup DID smell good... but, "What makes you think this is my favourite soup?" she asked.
"Because you always used to ask mother to make it for you, my dear daughter! A father remembers these things!" the man asked.
"Father?!" Lita sputtered.
"Yes dear? What is it?" he asked.
Lita shook her head, "Listen, sir... thank you for the food.. but.."
"But nothing!! And you don't need to call me 'sir'. You never did, sweetie!" he said. Lita opened her mouth to protest, but the man stuffed a sweet-bun into it instead. She was about to spit it out, but realized she was actually quite hungry, and gulped it down. The man watched Lita as the Aerialan helped herself to the soup. He smiled, "When you left me all those years ago, I never thought I'd see you again! Oh daddy's missed you so much, honey!"
The look in the man's eyes was almost pitiful. "I'm sorry... but my name is LITA... I'm an Aerialan, and a WrestleFleet officer aboard the Titanprize - a ship currently in orbit around your planet. I'm not sure who LISA is, but---"
The man looked at her, then turned away, "Couldn't you humour an old man for a bit, child?" he asked.
"Humour...?" she asked, then realized, "You know I'm not your daughter, don't you?"
He turned back to her and sighed, "My daughter looked very much like you. And it's true, when I saw you, I thought you were her." he looked down, "You received quite a bump on your head during the raid. I was hoping you would have memory loss... and I would be able to bring my daughter back to life... but..." he shook his head, "It seems your memory is very much intact." his watery blue eyes met hers, "Selfish of me, isn't it?" he asked.
Lita smiled softly, "Perhaps, but understandable..." she said.
"My name is Ak'it," He held out a hand.
Lita shook shook it, "I'm Lita," she replied, then noticed something missing, "My comm badge... where is it?"
"Comm badge?" he asked.
"Yes. It's a pin with the initials WF in silver against a gold background..."
"Oh. I didn't see anything like that when I found you three days ago..." he said.
"THREE days ago?" Lita sputtered.
"Yes. I've been nursing you back to health for three days now. You would wake every so often, but not long enough to remember..." he replied.
Lita smiled at him, "I appreciate you nursing me back to health..." she said, then grew serious, "The raid... I had two friends with me..." she said.
"A blonde man and his girlfriend - a brunette lady?"
Lita smiled, "I’d hardly call her his girlfriend… but yes. Them."
The man nodded, "I saw them being led away by the Kayfabe army. "
"Kayfabe army? What is that? And why did they raid the market square?"
"They're extremist. They don't like outsiders on Sakura. As you can see, we live on trade here. We have many off-world products, and many visitors. This is the third time they've raided the Market Square this month."
"Well... why doesn't anyone stop them? Surely your government..."
"Our government doesn't think the Kayfabes are a big enough threat. They haven't attacked the main downtown core, just the smaller ones," Ak'it sighed, "Like our village,"
"Well, then why don't YOU guys do anything?" Lita asked.
"Oh no no! We couldn't possibly!" he said. "We are not fighters..."
"Sometimes you've got to fight whether you like it or not! If these rebels are destroying your only means of income, then you have to DO something!" Lita insisted.
The man smiled, "Would you teach us?" he asked.
"Teach you? Do you want me to teach you how to fight?" she asked.
"Yes. Please! If I can gather enough people... will you and your ship help us?" he asked.
Lita sighed, "You would have to talk to our Captain... he's the one who decides these things. But we can't give you any weapons. It goes against some never-spoken of WrestleFleet rule..."
"Weapons we have..." he said. "The skill to use them, we DON'T..."
Lita smiled, "Then perhaps we CAN work out something after all!"
***
PLANET SAKURA - KAYFABE HEADQUARTERS: HOLDING CELL
"I can't believe you!" Stephanie snapped as she paced around the small cell she shared with Lt. Commander Jericho, "You're supposed to be this super-smart computer, and you STILL can't get us out of here!"
"I can open the door to the cell," Lt. Commander Jericho replied, "But as for getting us past the thirty Kayfabes down the hall, NO..." he frowned, "You're supposed to be the brilliant engineer... so why don't YOU think of something!"
"Maybe if I had the proper equipment... or something to make one of Ensign Hardly's swanton bombs---"
"As a distraction..." Jericho finished for her, "While they don't do much damage, they visually daze the enemy..."
"God, you're sounding all robotic again, Jericho..." Stephanie replied. "Don't tell me you turned off the emotion chip I worked so hard to make for you!"
Jericho looked at her. Was she upset? He quickly shook his head, and reached into his memory banks for one of the nicknames he had given to her so long ago, "No, Skankanie. I didn't turn it off..." he replied. I can't turn off something that is already inactive... he thought.
"Good!" she said. "Because if you EVER turn it off again, I'll personally have you melted down for scrap! I don't need to interact with a stupid, unemotional robot! Heaven knows I interact with Ensign Blackman enough!"
If she knew the chip didn't work... But she would never know. He would never tell her. He COULD never tell her. It would break her heart.
...And why would an unemotional robot care about the heart of one Commander Stephanie McMahon?
***
WWF TITANPRIZE - SICKBAY
"So... after these 'fashion victims' invaded the square, what happened?" Captain McMahon asked the newly awakened Ensigns Edge and Christian.
Ensign Jeff Hardy sat nearby, waiting to hear news about Lita.
"That's when we got whacked on our beautiful heads, sir..." Ensign Christian said. "Do you know how hard it is to get blood out of your hair?" he asked.
"I don't CARE, Ensign!" McMahon snapped, "Right now, I'm trying to find my daughter!"
"Before I totally passed out, I saw the fashion DON'TS leading them away at phaser point..." Edge replied.
"THEM?" McMahon asked.
"Yeah... Commander Stephanie and Lt. Commander Jericho."
McMahon hung his head. So she was with Jericho. Just great. If the raiders didn't kill them, they'd kill each other!
"Woah... McMahon, dude... you look super worried!" Christian said.
"Captain, you don't need to worry about Steph and Jericho. They won't do anything to each other..." Jeff smirked slightly, "Or maybe they will...." he said, then grew serious. He took a deep breath and turned to Edge and Christian, "What about Lita? Did you see what happened to her?" he asked.
"No dude... sorry..." Edge replied.
Jeff chewed his lower lip nervously, thinking the worst.
"Captain," a voice came over the comm, "The Rock is getting a roody poo communication from the surface. It's encoded with a WrestleFleet signature,"
"Be right there!" McMahon replied, and quickly headed to the bridge. Jeff followed.
Dr. Taker looked at Edge and Christian, "If you two are feeling better, get your asses out of my sickbay..."
"Doctor! Tsk tsk!" Angle scolded as he came up to Taker. "You shouldn't rush your patients out like that! It's not very nice!"
"Me sticking my fist in your mouth won't be very nice either, boy!" Taker replied.
***
BRIDGE
Captain McMahon looked at the screen before him. Ensign Lita stood there, surrounded by a group of Sakurans. "Ensign Lita," McMahon started. "Report!"
"Sir, there is a rebel army on this planet called the Kayfabes," Lita started, "They seem intent on destroying all outside influences, including the outsiders themselves. I have befriended a man here named Ak’it, and he’s informed me that Jericho and Stephanie are most likely being held at Kayfabe headquarters"
"Is there any way to get to them?" McMahon asked.
"Well that’s where the Titanprize comes in," Lita said. "My new friends have the weapons, but not the fighting skills. If perhaps we can send some security members down here, we might be able to teach these people how to defend themselves, and get our officers back,"
Captain McMahon nodded, "I’ll send Lieutenants Bradshaw and Farooq, Ensign Chyna, and Commander Kane down. Do the Sakurans know where the Kayfabe headquarters are?" he asked.
"Yes sir. If we can come up with a viable plan, then we can save them!" Lita replied.
"I hope so! I want my baby back!" McMahon said.
"Uh… and Lt. Commander Jericho too, sir, right?" Lita asked.
"Oh… yes yes… him too…" McMahon added quickly. He then turned to Commander Kane, who was at the security station, "Go get your team, and beam your big red ass down there! NOW!"
Kane nodded, and headed out.
***
PLANET SAKURA – KAYFABE HOLDING CELL
Lt. Commander Jericho opened a section under his forearm, and pulled out a few wires. He could always replace them back on the ship. He handed the wires to Stephanie. She looked at them, "Ewww… these are… like... your insides!" she said.
"Yes. You’ll need them…" he replied, then put his hands along the walls, feeling for a hollow section. "Found it!" He punched a small hole in the poorly constructed wall, and ripped out a handful of fiber optic cables.
"Just make sure no one sees the hole you just made!" Stephanie hissed, "Or this whole plan is shot!"
"I know what I’m doing, Skankanie!" he replied.
"I sure hope so, Jerk-icho, because if these stupid Kayfabes find out you’re trying to make a swanton bomb, they’ll use you for spare parts …"
"Glad to see you look on the bright side…!" Jericho replied dryly.
"Well gee… after almost DYING a few million times---" she stopped quickly as they heard footsteps coming down the hall. Jericho quickly leaned against the wall where the new hole was, obscuring it from the Kayfabe who had just stopped in front of the cell.
"Here’s your food!" the Kayfabe said. He opened the doors and slid two trays into the cell, then locked the door and walked on.
"Well, I guess they haven’t been doing any tests on us while we slept…" she said. "Or else they would know you don’t eat. They’d know EVERYTHING about you!"
"I’m awake even when you sleep. I wouldn’t allow them to touch me…" he paused, "Or you..."
"I thought Jeff Hardly was supposed to be my guardian angel," Stephanie muttered. "Don’t tell me you’ve replaced him…"
"...and that would be a problem?" he asked.
"Of COURSE!" Stephanie snapped, "I wouldn’t want to think I owed you anything!"
"You don’t think you owe JEFF anything, why would it be different with me…?" Jericho asked.
"Because Jeff is just Jeff! You’re … well… YOU…" she sighed, and turned away, "Never mind."
Jericho shrugged, and bent down to pick up the trays by the door. He handed Stephanie hers and she dug in… while he just stared blankly at his own. He was running out of room behind his cot to hide the trays, though luckily the Kayfabe's hadn't noticed the acrid smell of rotting food coming from his side of the cell.
Jericho sighed, and took a bite of the bun in front of him. It could be broken down in his system and reintegrated into energy, albeit wasted energy.
"You can EAT?" Stephanie asked with surprise, her mouth full of food.
"Yes. I just don’t HAVE to …" he said. "You’ve seen me drink synthehol too…"
"Well, that’s to imitate human behaviour," Stephanie replied.
"True…" he said, "But I’ve grown used to it…"
"Gosh, Chris… keep this up, and I just might start treating you like human being instead of a big stupid robot…" Stephanie replied
"Wouldn’t THAT be a shame…" he muttered.
***
TITANPRIZE – SICKBAY
"Dr. Taker, sir…" Ensign Angle started, "I think I found a way to brighten your sickbay!" he said happily.
Taker looked at him, wondering what was under the sheet the foolish Ensign had entered Sickbay with.
Angle pulled the sheet off the rectangular object to reveal a large picture of … himself… in bright red, white, and blue. He smiled, "Well? What do you think? It will add some colour to this otherwise drab sickbay,"
"Get...... Out......" Dr. Taker hissed slowly, his voice cold enough to send shivers down Angle’s spine, "GET OUT!" he repeated, "NOW."
Angle gulped, and quickly ran out of the sickbay, leaving his picture behind. Dr. Taker picked the picture up, and broke it in half over his knee, then tossed it in the hall.
Satan help him… he was this close to chokeslamming the Olympic Ensign straight to hell.
"Having problems with your assistant, Taker?" Dr. Piro asked as he came up to the dark doctor, gliding like a ghost. The skeletal man allowed a small smile, obviously enjoying the situation.
"Better I have a problem with HIM then with YOU," Taker replied, then smiled coldly, "Unless, of course, you dream of causing me a problem…"
"Dream?" Dr. Piro paled, if that was possible for a man whose face was already bone-white. He remembered a rather disturbing dream he had had some time ago… a dream about a certain dark man ripping his heart out with his bare hands…
Piro looked up at Taker. It couldn’t have been…
"Is there a problem, Vampy?" Taker asked. "You seem to be looking a tad under the weather. Perhaps you need a doctor?"
Dr. V. M. Piro’s eyes went wide, then he quickly regained his composure, "No…!" he snapped, "I’m FINE, Taker!" Piro then went back to his side of the Sickbay to tend to a semi-conscious Nytron, who seemed to have a piece of guitar imbedded in his forehead.
Dr. Taker studied Dr. Piro. He briefly wondered if his non-corporeal supervisors knew Piro like They knew Taker. Taker chuckled to himself. Even if They DID, Piro was no where NEAR as powerful as Taker. No where NEAR.
***
PLANET SAKURA – MARKET SQUARE MEETING HALL
Captain McMahon watched as his security team set about teaching the Sakurans to fight. He paced nervously, waiting for any news on how to get his precious Stephanie back safe.
"Sir?" Chyna came up behind him.
He turned to face her, "Yes, Ensign?"
Chyna smiled, knowing exactly what he was fretting about, "She’s with Chris, sir… he won’t let anything happen to her…"
McMahon sighed, "I don’t know what I’m more worried about," McMahon said, "Stephanie being locked up by violent rebels, or Stephanie being locked up with Lt. Commander Jericho!"
Chyna furrowed her brow, "Why would you be worried about her being locked up with Jericho?"
"Well, they always seem to be at each other’s throats. I don’t think a day has gone by where they don’t fight. They hate each other more then they could hate any enemy!"
Chyna laughed, "Is the entire McMahon family this blind to the obvious?" she asked.
"What is that supposed mean, Ensign, and what do you find so damn funny about my daughter being locked up with an android she hates?" McMahon asked.
Chyna quickly sobered up, "Forgive me, sir…" she said, "I didn’t mean to speak out of line… but… don’t you ever wonder why they always seem to be arguing?"
"Because they despise each other..." McMahon replied simply.
Chyna was about to say more when Commander Kane called her name, "Sorry sir, I have to go…" she replied, then headed off to continue training the Sakurans.
Captain McMahon tapped his comm badge, "McMahon to Titanprize,"
"What does your candy ass want, McMahon?" Came Lt. Rock’s reply.
"A while ago on planet Bietel, Lt. Commander Austin was able to send a message to Jericho’s positronic net. Would he be able to do that again?"
"Oh hell yeah," Came Austin’s reply, "If he ain’t too far underground and their isn’t too much interference…"
"Try it, Lt. Commander," McMahon replied. "I need to find my daughter!"
"She’s with that jabroni Jericho?" Rock asked through the comm, then chuckled quietly.
"What’s so funny, Lieutenant?" McMahon asked. Why did everyone find it so bloody humorous that Stephanie was locked up with Lt. Commander Jericho? Surely the two were probably at each other’s throats by now! McMahon had never seen two officers who gave off so many sparks by merely looking at each other!
Wasn’t anyone else concerned for his sweet daughter’s well-being? If Lt. Commander Jericho hadn’t been such a reliable and efficient officer, McMahon would have relieved him of duty for all the horrible things the bot had said about the Captain’s only daughter.
Rock muttered something to Austin about Jericho and poontang pie. Austin chuckled uncharacteristically.
McMahon furrowed his brow, "I’m sorry, Lt. Rock… did you just say something about my daughter?" he asked.
"You've already heard everything the Rock has to say about your 2 credit daughter, McMahon," Rock replied, "But anyway, the Rock will see what he can do to help Austin send a message to Jericho’s candy ass,"
"You do that then," McMahon replied, then cut the comm link. He only prayed that Jericho and Stephanie hadn’t killed each other yet.
***
PLANET SAKURA – KAYFABE HOLDING CELL
"OW! Damnit, Jericho!" Stephanie whined. "When I asked you to teach me some moves, I didn’t mean for you to rip my head off!"
"Oh, geeeeeee I’m sorry," Jericho replied snidely, "Is the headlock too tight, Stephie?" Stephanie reached an elegantly manicured hand up his back and pulled his hair… hard! He winced slightly, then let go of her, "Is THAT the type of defense Matt’s been teaching you?" he asked. "How to pull hair?"
"Hey… I know how to do a drop toe-hold too!" she snapped.
"Oh yeah… that’s a great move…" he muttered dryly, "That’ll win you tons of fights…" He was amazed how good he was at pretending to have a functional emotion chip. He was actually becoming ANNOYED that Stephanie lacked simple self-defense.
"So TEACH me something, Mr. Know-it-all!" she snapped, hands on hips.
He took a moment to think of what to teach her first. "Ok," he said finally, "If one of them grabs you from behind, how do you get away?"
"Um… struggle until they let go?" she asked.
He sighed and shook his head. "Here. Let me show you..." he went up behind her, and put his arms around her waist.
"HEY! What are you doing? PERVERT!" she snapped, and struggled to get out of his grasp.
"Use your elbows!" he replied, "Try to connect with my body instead of just struggling!" And she did. In fact, she connected one sharp elbow with his head, "Ouch!" He released her quickly, rubbing his temple, frowning.
"Did I do something wrong?" Stephanie asked.
"No. It was right. It just hurt!" he replied. "Ok. Next lesson. Once you get free of the enemy’s arms, what do you do?"
"Fight them?" she asked.
He looked at her carefully, then shook his head, "You wouldn’t last two minutes in a fight, Stephie. What YOU do is run like hell, and let ME handle it. Got it?" he said.
"Listen!" Stephanie snapped. "I’m sick and tired of people always having to come to my rescue! I want to be able to save MYSELF for once!"
He studied her. She looked so determined, her blue eyes flashing with fire. What could he say? "What IS Matt teaching you, exactly?" he asked.
"It’s some form of high-flying Aerialan fighting!" she said.
"That won't help in a brawl!" he replied. "When we get back to the Titanprize, ask Lt. Commander Austin to teach you how to street fight!"
"Do you honestly think I can pull Austin away from his beer long enough to teach me ANYTHING?" she said, frowning.
"Good point…" Jericho replied, then suddenly his expression went blank.
Stephanie looked at him, and furrowed her brow, "Jericho?" she asked. Nothing. "Hey, IDIOT!" she snapped.
Jericho blinked his eyes, then turned back to Stephanie, "I suggest you practice your self-defense," he said. "I just received a message from the Titanprize computer. McMahon has gathered the Sakurans together, and is currently heading to our coordinates,"
"How do they know where we are?" Stephanie asked.
"I know where we are. They received the coordinates from my data banks!"
Stephanie’s eyes brightened, "So Daddy’s coming to get me?!" she asked happily, "I knew he’d save me!!"
Jericho looked at her, frowning, "I thought you didn’t want to be rescued any more. You wanted to take care of yourself?"
"Well… you can teach me how to do that AFTER we’re out of here!"
"ME teach you?" he asked, "Why ME?"
"Because I don’t have any other friends!" she snapped
Jericho furrowed his brow, "You consider me your friend?" he asked.
"That… that’s not what I meant!" she said quickly, "I mean… god… of COURSE you’re not my friend! I just meant that… uh… I'd rather you teach me because your programming will prevent you from killing me while we train!"
Jericho studied her, "Riiiiiight…" he said.
"Don’t flatter yourself, Jericho!" Stephanie replied, "Like I could ever be friends with a walking computer!"
You seem to be friends with every OTHER male on the ship…" he started.
"Don’t even GO there!" Stephanie snapped.
"YOU already did, Stephie… many times!" he replied, and smiled smugly. His positronic net must have been working overtime to adapt and change the insults stored in his memory banks. It was almost as if he DID have an active emotion chip again.
Suddenly their argument was interrupted by the sounds of a fight outside.
Five rebels ran up to the holding cell, weapons ready… but they were quickly blinded by a flash of light from one of Stephanie and Jericho’s hand-made swanton bombs.
When the rebels could see again, the cell door was wide open, and the two WrestleFleet officers were gone.
Within moments, the Sakurans ran-in and set about taking over the Kayfabe headquarters.eir livelyhoods would be safe once more.
TITANPRIZE – SICKBAY
Taker went through the day's patients methodically, barely speaking except to give them a command to sit up or lie down.
Ensign Angle studied him carefully, "You still lack compassion when you tend to your patients, Dr. Taker, sir." He said.
Taker turned around and glared at him, "You want to see compassion?" he asked.
Angle nodded, "Yes sir!"
Without another word, Taker grabbed Angle around the neck. Angle screamed and struggled as Dr. Taker lifted him high into the air, then quickly dropped him through an empty diagnostics table, "I didn’t chokeslam you to hell…" the doctor hissed at the barely conscious Angle, now lying in the debris of the table, "THAT is compassion, boy!" he replied.
Dr. Taker smiled coldly. Next
time, he would introduce Angle to the last ride...
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