What the Phuck is a Phronk?

A few people have recently asked where my nickname, Phronk, came from. My origin goes all the way back to Grade 9, when I was blasted with gamma radiation from space in gym class lining up to do the pole vault. A few other dudes and I were getting to know each other. One of them forgot my name, and said something like "you...what's your name again? Phronk or something?" Of course, this was quite funny for everyone else, so occasionally they would call me Phronk. The idea for calling me Phronk multiplied and spread like rabbits made of peanut butter, and eventually even my close friends were calling me Phronk (or Phronko). Where did "Phronk" come from? Later questioning revealed that the originator thought I looked French, because I had a little moustache, and Phronk is a French name (?).

There is a certain amount of controversy surrounding this story. It is unknown who originally came up with the name, and I seem to remember arguments between candidates as to who blurted it out first. The spelling is also uncertain. I remember myself and other kids taking turns writing out different ways to spell it on the back chalkboard in the middle of French class (appropriately enough). For example, I could have been "Fronk", "Phraunques", Fphrawnc", etc. I settled on the current spelling when I first got on the internet and had to choose a nickname for something.

There is also a character in the movie Father of the Bride with the same name. However, it is spelled Frank and has nothing to do with me.

Well, this has been a nice self-indulgent post about how I became The Incredible Phronk. You asked for it.

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