Mossimo - The Interview

Conducted by AZM (Anti-Zellers Man)

AZM: Thanks for taking the time out of your busy schedule to do this interview Mossimo.

Mossimo: No problem I was only eating mayonnaise and masturbating, think nothing of it, and please call me Moss.

AZM: Thanks Moss. Now tell me what made you sell your name and soul to a horrible company like Zellers ?

Moss: Well I decided to follow the leads of other great celebrities selling their names out to discount retail chains, such as Martha Stewart, Jacquline Smith, and Kathy Lee Gifford.

AZM: How to you offer your clothes at such great prices ?

Moss: Well sweatshops play a big part. You can threaten children so easily, so if they don’t make enough merchandise for only pennies an hour, you just take them out back and beat them senseless and threaten to kill their families. It really gets them moving and keeps costs way low.

AZM: Do you feel bad that you were once a big name designer, and now you have to sell your clothing at Zellers, isn’t it like a fall from grace ?

Moss: No my fall from grace was marrying Full House `star` Lori Loughlin.

AZM: Where do you get your ideas for the clothes you design and sell at Zellers ?

Moss: Well todays trailer parks are a gold mines for fresh ideas, White Trash is like a deadly disco inferno of Fashion.

AZM: Would you ever consider shopping at Zellers ?

Moss: (Hysterical Laughter) Good God no.  

AZM:  Thanks for taking the time to talk with me today Moss, your truly a star, and a great designer.

Moss: I know.