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How many Arians does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but it takes a lot of light bulbs. (*smash* *pop* *crash*) How many Tauruses does it take to change a lightbulb? One, but just *try* to convince them that the burned out bulb is useless and should be thrown away. How many Geminis does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, but they never change it - they just keep arguing about who is supposed to do it and how it's supposed to be done. How many Cancerians does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but it takes a therapist three years to help them through the grieving process. How many Leos does it take to change a lightbulb? None: Leos are so enthusiastic they carry their own light. How many Virgos does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's see, one to spot the bulb, one to record the time the bulb burned out and the date it was purchased, one to decide who's fault it is that the bulb burned out and ask why that brand was chosen in the first place, ten to decide to remodel the house as long as they're changing the bulb.... How many Libras does it take to change a lightbulb? Er, two, or, maybe one. No--on second thought, make that two. Is that OK with you? How many Scorpios does it take to change a lightbulb? That information is strictly secret and only shared with the inner members of the hierarchical order. How many Sagittarians does it take to change a lightbulb? A whole bunch: You can only keep them in the room long enough for each of them to give the bulb a quarter turn. How many Capricorns does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Why should I bother? It's probably just going to burn out again tomorrow anyway. How many Aquarians does it take to change a lightbulb? A hundred, but they'll all be competing to be the one to change the bulb and bring light into the world. How many Pisceans does it take to change a lightbulb? What lightbulb? How many Pagans does it take to change a lightbulb? Six. One to change it, and five to sit around complaining that lightbulbs never burned out before those Christians came along. How many Unitarians does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the bulb, and two to discuss the ethical implications of bulb-changing on a multi-cultural society. How many Gardernians does it take to change a light bulb? "Why do you want to know...initiate?" How long does it take a Gardernian to change a lightbulb? A year and A day in an Outer Grove a year and a day at first level a year and a day at second level but only Third Levels actually get to change light bulbs. How many Alexandrians does it take to change a light bulb? 13. One High Priestess to change the bulb, and 12 to hold her up under all that jewelry. How long does it take a Alexandrian to change a lightbulb? That's the Maiden's Job. Maiden - Make it so. How many Dianic Wiccan does it take to change a lightbulb? One to change the bulb, two to run the creche, and one to check that no men have sneaked in. How many Thelemites does it take to change a light bulb? None - real Thelemites aren't afraid of the dark. How many Golden Dawners does it take to change a light bulb? One to hold the ladder, one to hold the bulb, three to decipher the Light Bulb Ritual from the Secret Chiefs, one to publish it, and one to sue all the others. How many NRDers does it take to change a light bulb? 14. One to do it, one to write poetry about it, and 12 to hold a Council and decide whether or not the poem's authentic. How many Druids does it take to change a lightbulb? One to hold the lightbulb and twelve to drink until the room spins. How many Family traditionalists does it take to change a light bulb? Candle light was good enough for our ancestors, it's good enough for us! How many British Trad Wiccans does it take to change a light bulb? 13. One to change the bulb, and 12 to mourn the passing of the old bulb. How many Starhawk witches does it take to change a light bulb? "There are starving villages in Africa that don't even have light bulbs..." How many solitary witches does it take to change a light bulb? (drum your fingers and stare at them as you wait for them to grasp the obvious) How many White Light Wiccans does it take to change a lightbulb? Look deep within and find your true essence. That will tell you how many it will take. How many Frost "School of Wicca" witches does it take to change a light bulb? "Just you! That's right, YOU! And for only $195 we'll send you our complete "Witches Magic Power of Light Bulb Changing Course" with real knowledge that you can apply this to ANY light bulb ANYwhere! Listen to the testimony of a young couple from Wisconsin who..." How many Isians does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the lightbulb, one to handle publicity, and one to write the newsletter. How many Erisians does it take to change a light bulb? "Err... How many have we got?" How many Eclectics does it take to change a light bulb? They don't bother, they're used to working in the dark! How many Discordians does it take to change in a lightbulb? 2-One to hold a ladder and one to fill the bathtub with brightly colored east german machine tools. How many Wiccans does it take to change in a lightbulb? Four. One for each direction. How many members of IOT does it take to change in a lighbulb? Sorry, that ritual is copyrighted. How many Proteans does it take to change a light bulb? I can't tell you--we never change a light bulb the same way twice! :} How many Buckland witches does it take to change a light bulb? "Refer to my second book, Practical Light Bulb Changing by Raymond Buckland..." How many tantrics does it take to change a light bulb? 2, as long as the lamp is by the bed... How many Ceremonial magicians does it take to change a light bulb? One. They hold it up, and the world revolves around them. How many Kabbalists does it take to change a light bulb? 261. How many toads does it take to change a light bulb? One, if you can remember which one used to be the electrician. How many New-agers does it take to change a light bulb? We don't use light bulbs, we just think happy thoughts at our quartz crystals and they glow. How long does it take a New-Ager to change a lightbulb? None. They just join self-help groups to learn to live with darkness in their lives. How many witches does it take to change a light bulb? Into what? How many ADF druids does it take to change a light bulb? Six. One to change the bulb, one to write a song about how much better the old bulb was, and four to write conflicting parodies of the second Druid's song. How many shamans does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just change shape into a cat or bat, and can see in the dark. How many Aradianic Faerie Witches does it take to screw in a light bulb? At least two, but they've got to be really small to fit in that light bulb! How many Jewish Grandmothers does it take to change a light bulb? "Don't mind me, I'll just sit here in the dark...." How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change it, one to lead the prayer, and one to call the priest so he can bless the new bulb. How many Zen Masters does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to screw in the bulb, one to not screw in the bulb, and one to neither screw nor not screw in the bulb. 
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